Christopher Randall is seated in the Canadian Ballroom at Toronto’s Fairmont Royal York Hotel. Eight-hundred people surround him, elegantly dressed and eager to enjoy an exquisite evening. From his table, he observes the giant screen before him, upon which the following message is projected: In honour of Kenneth Halnan who suffered from arthritis and Audrey Lulu Lishman Halnan, with love from their son, Christopher.
The date is Saturday, November 2, 2024, and Christopher is a guest at the third annual Arthritis Fire Ball™ Toronto. New Classical FM and Zoomer Radio, at which Christopher is Vice President of Marketing & Promotion, is a sponsor. The event marks a chance for Christopher to help raise funds for and critical awareness around the disease with which his father Ken lived. It is also a chance to come to peace with what Christopher felt was a tumultuous relationship.
The cold, cruel clasp of arthritis
In the early 1960s when Christopher was a child, his father developed rheumatoid arthritis. It progressed quickly and ferociously, transforming Ken’s body and demeanor. Christopher remembers: “He was an active man until arthritis arrived. His hands became increasingly gnarled, his fingers went in every direction. It affected his ability to drive, walk, go out, have lunch, do things socially, lift things. It limited his body and mind.”
When Christopher conjures memories of his father, he sees a man who took pride in his appearance. He pictures his dad writing, one of his favourite pastimes. He has visions of Ken playing hockey with his sons or hoisting them into the backyard tree. These recollections dissolve, however, when Christopher contemplates how arthritis crept into his father’s world.
Instead of seeing his dad in a well-tailored suit, he sees a man who couldn’t put on a tie or lace up his own shoes. Rather than seeing Ken smiling with a pen in hand, he sees a man staring at his own deformed fingers in disbelief. As opposed to seeing his father enjoying the company of his children, he sees a man lying in bed or shuffling down the hall, hand on the wall for support.
“Arthritis took away his pleasure. His mobility, appearance, ability to live life fully – these things were deeply affected. It was so difficult for him to be debilitated,” Christopher says. “It caused anger and resentment.”
A matter of miscommunication
For decades, Christopher misinterpreted those emotions.
“I thought he was angry because he learned I was gay. It didn’t occur to me until much later that his mood and behaviour were immensely impacted by arthritis agony,” he says.
Christopher started to reassess his relationship with his dad, who passed away 35 years ago, after the death of his mom in 2022. He began to understand, as well as one can from a distance, the trauma of Ken’s Second World War experience. He began to appreciate the hardships his father faced owing to psoriasis, which he was diagnosed with in 1967. He began to recognize the unyielding torment his dad endured because of arthritis.
“It wasn’t until further reflection that I realized how much my dad suffered, a lot of it due to arthritis,” Christopher says. “Something like taking us kids to the Canadian National Exhibition – my dad hired babysitters to take us. He couldn’t do it.”
Having grasped the full extent of his father’s arthritis, Christopher felt compelled to help confront the disease. He found a path with Arthritis Society Canada.
“I thought about what I could do in my role at New Classical FM and Zoomer Radio. I landed on going above and beyond the call of duty by sponsoring Arthritis Society Canada’s Arthritis Fire Ball™ Toronto,” he says. “It’s an honour to do it for my dad, to help work to end the disease from which he suffered so profoundly.”
Christopher says it’s been a healing journey to view his relationship with his father through a new lens, one in which his sexuality bears no influence.
“I’ve realized things now. I understand and forgive. There was a lot of suffering I wasn’t aware of, and I can show compassion now at age 64 that I couldn’t show at age 14 or 24,” he says.
After a brief pause, he continues: “My father has been dead for 35 years. It’s wonderful that his son is now working with Arthritis Society Canada to help other Christopher Randalls and Ken Halnans. In this tiny way, by getting involved through the radio station, I can help. That’s positive, and others can do the same. Advocate, encourage research, get people committed to the cause. If you’ve been touched by a disease like arthritis, get involved to help make it disappear.”